Picked up this piece on the net at a website called sportbilly.co.za

The man is some kind of biased New Zealand supporter of sorts… and obviously oblivious of what is really happening here in South Africa at present.

This Article of course does not necessarily reflect my own views or that of Rugby-Talk, but at least someone was willing to nail his beliefs to the wall!

Here it is:

Super Rugby previews are more numerous than Whitney Houston tributes at the moment. In both cases time is wasted. There seems to be a reluctance amongst sports writers in general to spare one’s balls from the impending pain and climb down off the fence. So lets now seperate the poop from the champagne when it comes to the teams.

I am not going to bore you with in depth analysis of the no-hopers. I’m looking at potential champions here. To win this thing you have got to finish top of your conference. Bottom line. The ‘extended playoff’ scenario gives the ‘also rans’ a cruel illusion of hope but their chances remain slimmer than a Somalian hunger striker.

Here is how I see it.

Champagne status is only for those teams that can win it. Skidmark status implies that big poop could be around the corner, they are the teams that flatter to deceive. Poop status is reserved for those I feel have as much chance of winning SupeRugby 2012 as the Lions have of declaring a dividend. As such I won’t be wasting a word on them.

 

The Poop:

Australia: Brumbies, Force and Rebels

New Zealand: Chiefs, Highlanders and Hurricanes

South Africa: Bulls, Cheetahs and Lions

 

The Skidmarks:

Australia: Waratahs

8 Out of 10 fans of the Waratahs list their favourite pastimes as queuing for food, attending family reunions and filing. All three happen to bring more joy than watching the Waratahs in action. For all Super Rugby viewers let’s hope that Super Sarel brings a little cheer to dull out the jeer this year. They’re somehow always there or thereabouts when play-ff time arrives but won’t be worrying the engravers come August.

New Zealand: Blues

The antithesis of the Waratahs. The Blues are all flash but no cash to show for it. On any given Friday, Saturday or Sunday they will destroy the best this competition has to offer but they have the consistency of a post peanut poo.

South Africa: Stormers

John Cleese could have been describing the Stormers’ retention policy when he said ‘as porous as a whore’s drawers’. That coupled with a peculiarly stubborn resistance to admit their front row couldn’t scrum a machine will once again leave the Newlands’ faithful having to book flights to view silverware.

 

The Champagne:

Australia: Reds

With Quade re-Cooperating on the sidelines for the opening few rounds, the defending champs may be tested. Ewen MacKenzie is a fantastic coach who has built the Reds into the team that once got Greg Martin semi erect. They have the belief and a secure fortress in Suncorp Stadium to dominate the Australian conference once again. The relative weakness of their conference will allow the Reds to finish in the top two.

New Zealand: Crusaders

Perennial contenders. What they achieved in 2011 considering their circumstances is remarkable and they will build on this spirit in 2012. Dan Carter and Richie McCaw are without doubt the best in their positions in the world even after all these years. When the going gets tough, the Crusaders get going. They will want ‘their’ title back.

South Africa: The Sharks

The Sharks have been the fat bridesmaids of the competition – dressed for success but not quite the whole package. With influential game breakers like Bismarck Du Plessis, Willem Alberts, Pat Lambie and JP Pietersen in the ranks they should be title contenders. John Smit’s departure means the first choice front row can get on with the job. The soft underbelly of a mediocre midfield may be negated by the bold selection of Tim Whitehead and JP Pietersen ahead of the rather dismal Meyer Bosman and Marius Joubert.

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Disclaimer: This view does not reflect the views of Rugby-Talk or it’s proprietor or the Author of this Article. It is an outside perspective, sourced on the world wide web.

8 Responses to Honest, yet biased view of Super Rugby team chances

  • 1

    Well… to the actual Author of the Article at Sportsbilly or whatever…

    You are clearly a New Zealand supporter of sorts, therefore I will take your skewed, naiive and uninformed view about all 5 SA Super Rugby Teams chances with a pinch of salt and with the contempt it deserves!

    You might just get a few surprises along the way this year, Mr Poop!

    Only the uninformed writes off teams like the Bulls, simply because they lost a number of experienced players… because only the uninformed and an outsider to South Africa, would be oblivious of what they have bought and brought in to replace those players, what their season preparations have been like and how ready they are.

    Only the uninformed would just summarily dismiss the Lions and the Cheetahs, specially in light of how much continuity they have for once kept from previous seasons in their player ranks.

    Only the uninformed is blind to the status of his own preferred sides, the influence key injuries will have and what the exodus to the Northern Hemisphere has done to his own sides.

    In short Billy-the-bum, you’re biased… and your opinion smells like the skidmarks in your own underwear!

  • 2

    Phweeew, had to get that off my chest…. hehehe

  • 3

    Net die volgende woorde van Johan Sadie (vandag se Beeld) moet jou twee keer laat dink voor jy die Bulle afskryf:

    “Alles het verander sedert ek 13 weke gelede hier by die Bulls aangekom het. Ek is sterker, fikser, geestelik taaier en brand om al daardie harde werk van die laaste paar maande in aksie te omskep,” het Sadie gesê.

    “Dinge word heelwat anders hier gedoen as by die Stormers en elkeen van die streke het sy eie kultuur.

    “Ek wil nie graag die twee teen mekaar afspeel nie, maar kan wel sê dat ek nooit geweet het waartoe my liggaam en verstand in staat was voordat ek by die Bulls ingeval het nie. Ek het nie geweet ’n mens kan só ver gedruk word nie.”

    Die jong Bulle gaan nog ‘n paar spanne verras, hou hierdie spasie dop.

  • 4

    3 @ ben_die_bul:
    Die Bulls bestuur het ons einde verlede jaar by die Media-funksie belowe dit gaan ‘n klipharde voorseisoen wees, en ek is oortuig hulle het hul beloftes gestand gedoen.

    Die manne lyk hard, fiks en gefokus.

    Maar hierdie Super Rugby seisoen kan een van die strafste ooit wees, en moontlik baie meer gelyk as in voorgaande jare.

    Super Rugby hierdie jaar is meer onvoorspelbaar as OOIT tevore!

  • 5

    Now that the Bulls play in pink….
    1) One lucky season ticket holder will win a free make-over during half time of each match.
    2) Fans will no longer be allowed to braai before kick-off, instead fondue stations will be available for snacks.
    3) The beer tent will no longer sell beer, but a wide variety of fruity drinks will be available.
    4) The dancing girls will be replaced by a French poodle parade.
    5) The man of the match will not receive a trophy, but rather a subscription to House and Home magazine.
    6) The yellow card area will not be referred to as the Sin Bin, but will now be known as the Temper Tantrum Tank.
    7) The stadium name will change from the Bull-Ring to the Fairy Garden.
    8) The new mascot will be Lady the French Poodle.
    9) A booth will be provided to exchange those dangerous horned helmets for the more appropriate pink silk scarf.
    10) Liefling will still be the unofficial song…

    And finally…Pretoria is now going to be known as Poeftoria

  • 6

    Sorry lads, not johnny as I alluded to in the beginning, GBS caught me with my hands full of grapes this morning, it’s from a site called sportsbilly.co.za, I have no other info about the author, but he does have some very good articles.

  • 7

    Does this guy actually know his rugby? This year the SA Conference is going to be even more closely contested than last year. Most SA vs SA provincial games will be won bya small margin, possibly only by 7 points or less. He is obviously anti SA, and anti any team in SA but the Sharks

  • 8

    Interesting point about the Sharks front row….lets see if Bissie can do the business continually…..I don’t like the Sharks centre combo…JP is a Rolls Royce…I dont think he is going to enjoy the continual rough and tough stuff even though he comes from the Bluff….in the middle of the backline….but ja Meyer Bosman for me had a good year at the Freestate when he got a Bok jersey, then half a good year when he joined the Sharks….one of those guys perhaps who doesn’t realise what he has….but we’d be better off without him….Now Keegan Daniel at Centre!!!! theres a thought!

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